|Posted by Arna on February 16, 2012 at 6:40 PM|
A few thoughts on bullying… Bullying, crime, violence and war are all symptoms of great unhappiness and personal/social frustration. They are states of mind that are driven to the point of external representation. Terror is anxiety at its peak, spurred on by fear. If you have ever experienced an anxiety attack you will understand to what extent the body responds to this fear. The endocrine system goes haywire, adrenalin is pumped in mighty unusable doses causing a domino affect including the increase of heart rate and hyperventilation resulting in absolute panic and terror. Left to it’s own devices this panic can carry you to awful internal spaces leaving you incapacitated, exhausted and petrified of repeated attacks. The emotional immaturity that causes people to fall into patterns of fear and anxiety also hover behind the choice to utilise bullying as a mode of expression. And this, surprisingly is the very same immaturity that lurks at the base of our current war mentality. The school uniform may be exchanged for combat gear, the competitive strategies more finely tuned and the minds more structured but the mentality is quite the same. Humanity is in dire need of different tactics. It is not a mature choice to hurt others to get a point across, to encourage change or even to defend ourselves. It often seems as though this is the only way but that is the inherant nature of the immature mind. We are deceived by our emotional immaturity to feel forced into choosing violent and /or manipulative response strategies. As minds evolve new solutions will become clear and easily accessible and non-combatal tactics will fall into place with ease and grace. We are at the point in human evolution of addressing social unrest from a different perspective. With natural catastrophe’s becoming more frequent and devastating, a call for connection, cohesion and emotional maturity has gone out. People are GOOD. It is clear that we DESIRE to communicate, resolve our conflicts peacefully and to ultimately love each other family, friend and foe. Moving into a place of emotional maturity must begin now. The way to effectively do this is to address it in the home and in the school system. Enough of focus on the problem and defending our right to be safe. Let’s speculate on a mature mind’s thought pattern, consider focusing diligently on the positives in a person or a situation. Bullying starts because a child has no other resource for expression. It doesn’t matter that we think we supply children with options, these options are hypothetical. The options we give children are just words and nebulous clouds of expectation. When adults are unconsciously supporting a set of values that approve of war on any level, their antibullying words lose power. Children respond to integrity, acting out restlessly in the face of an adult’s unresolved tension or confusion. We all need to address out tendency to violence. We need to take a look at our value systems, uncovering the bullying that we rely on to make our lives ‘work’. Once we begin this process there is no turning back, life becomes an exciting unravelling of possibility. Most beautifully we find we are able to communicate with each other on a deeper and more effective level. Children LISTEN to us finally and it is easier to lead by example! We can properly teach emotional maturity because we are growing ourselves. Emotional intelligence is all that is missing in this world. What a different place it will be once we open up our minds in this way. Instilling the option of a positive value system and command over choices and emotions will be the greatest gift we can give to our children and to our future. Ease the frustration that lurks within our children through connection and communication, through personal responsibility and honesty and we will have prevented bullying. Once we see playground bullying decreasing we will know we are on track for a more peaceful future. The actions of the next generation will clearly indicate wether we have been successful in raising our maturity levels and consequently the maturity levels of our children to an acceptable level. I think this is an EASY task we just have to have the courage to START NOW.